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Tracie the Anti-Craft

One thing about Mormon culture is that it seems most Mormon women "craft". You will find the majority of them knitting, crocheting, stitching, sewing, stamping, card-making, scrapbooking, painting, lace-making, sponging, etc. If it can be made, sold at a party, or demoed at a convention, they are working on it. Really - you should see the madhouse that ensues at Joanne's fabrics whenever they have their big sale coupon in the newspaper.

I on the other hand do not do anything remotely crafty. When I was young I did the 4-H sewing projects (actually my Mom or the leader usually did it for me) but I didn't find it remotely interesting. For those rare moments when I did want to learn, no one would teach me because I was left-handed (how dare I be left-handed). And my Mom didn't know how to knit or crochet for the same reason, so she couldn't teach me. She tried valiantly to teach me to sew, but segue to Junior High Home Ec, where I sewed the pockets shut on my homemade apron (true story). In short, if there is anything that sends my self-esteem into the proverbial toilet, and makes me feel completely incompetent, it is crafts. Just hearing the word can send me into a panic attack lasting several hours.

So imagine the meltdown that occurred last night at Presidency Meeting when it was decided that next month's Relief Society activity would be a "craft" night. Not only that, but in March, we're going retro, working on crafts and dressing up like June Cleaver in our aprons and strands of pearls (I'm only slightly exaggerating here). For me it all sounded like a nightmare waiting to happen, and finally, red-faced, embarrassed and voice trembling, I just had to say that I probably would not be attending either of those activities. The Horror! The Horror! Frankly, I'd rather go to the girl doctor.

For the most part, I like to think of myself as a well-rounded woman. I read a lot and love history. I love movies and plays. I enjoy sports and the outdoors. I exercise and try to take care of myself. I sing well and I love music. I know a little about a lot of things, and have fun talking about it. I've been given a career that I'm good at. I enjoy cooking, and I like to travel. I love to learn and on occasion I'll take a community ed class. I love my family and friends, and I'm a darn good Aunt. I just prefer learning practical skills and having discussions about important things. For most people that would be enough. Mormon culture, however, is another story altogether. It's like there's another article of faith just for Relief Society, called "We Believe in Crafts". And if you don't believe in them, you rank right up there with Korihor. Just call me Tracie the Anti-Craft (I hope I can still get a temple recommend).

Comments

Holley said…
I say we form the Anti-Craft Relief Society, dedicated to good books, intellectual and artistic stimulation, and good food created by caring,wonderful women, who also don't craft. It will be a GREAT deal more fun, and we can respect ourselves a lot more, too :)
January 13, 2010 at 12:58 PM
The Perry Family said…
Why don't you tell us how you really feel??? :) I still love you even though you don't do crafts, although I think you should try card-making....it's fun and cheaper than buying greeting cards at the store!!!
January 13, 2010 at 2:02 PM
Angel said…
This is hysterical!! You evil woman, you! :)
January 13, 2010 at 2:06 PM
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